If you had asked me what I wanted to do with my life, I would have answered, maintain a consistent blog. Clearly I have failed at that, so I have since moved on to plan B, aerospace engineering where I would design awesome things that fly awesomely. At the beginning of the year, I was about 95% set on that, but I figured there was always a chance God could change my plan. Imagine that. Since last fall, that number had slid. God kept pushing me and showing me more of who I was. I've realized that engineering, although a great idea financially, may not fulfill me. This doubt has pushed my certainty to a really frustrating 50%... maybe.
What is taking up that other 50% (maybe)? Teaching. It's the only other thing I have ever considered doing, but I thought I was settled. It was a fun idea, but I'd settled on engineering. Only, that fun idea is becoming the doubt that I could be anywhere near as happy making things fly as imparting the knowledge of how that is even possible on others.
I understand more than ever that what I need to be happy is relationships, people. I love people. I don't care what is happening, but as long as friends are hanging out, I just want to be there. I'll do anything with my friends. I'll do anything for my friends. Same goes for my family. The only reason I ever even considered teaching was because of the phenomenal relationships I had with my teachers in high school. Two in particular I consider to be some of the most important people ever in my life and are integral to the person I am today. I know this need for relationships will be fulfilled by teaching, but I cannot be certain that engineering can do that as well.
So I guess that leaves me at plan C. I cannot change my major and graduate in four years, which I need to do for my scholarship, and I don't necessarily want to. Besides, I still don't even know which I'd rather do. Instead, my plan is to finish my Aerospace Engineering degree with a math minor. Assuming I get a job out of college, I'll work for two years, and by the end, I'll know what I want to do (hopefully). If I settle on engineering, I'll go back to school and get my masters. If I go with teaching, I'll do still that. If I teach, I want to teach high school physics and math, subjects I'll be well versed in from my undergrad. I'll go to a Concordia and do what it takes to become a teacher and get a master's degree. After that, I'd love to teach at my Lutheran HS, but I'll take any one that wants me. I like this plan. It leaves both options open, and I think having those years of engineering experience would be great for me if I decide to teach.
And what if God yet again steps in with something more to say? I guess that's plan D. Onwards.
